Saturday, September 30, 2006

Beta Ceta Alphabeast

Domino's Fudge Brownie Squares are not actually shit-saturated shag carpet-cubes.

You evening truth.

Three Green Inputs,

Friday, September 29, 2006

Stock is falling, peope are mauling

In life, there comes situations hilarious enough to cause self-reflection.

Question of the Day:

Are handicaps humorous?

Brett's Take: With a great deal of would-be remorse, yes, they are. However, laughing at those who have disabilities is followed by the most subsequent guilt, which usually serves as a lesson: don't laugh at disabled people. They can't do anything about it, so use some forced/natural empathy and be a friend to them.

There are exceptions though, such as a handicapped female from my good ol' high school. She's known for random and sporratic outbursts and screams that often penetrate the concetration of fellow students. Another habit of hers is to physically interact with peers by means of slapping, grabbing or submission moving each of which leaves the said girl viciously smiling as her 'opponent' is left awkwardly helpless. Normally, I'm very open with the special ed. students, having fun and conversations and whatnot. But with her, I'm terrified; she can strike at any time and who knows how she'll do it. Ignorant? Perhaps. Cautious? Definitely.

Anyways, she wore a shirt the other day:
'My Best Subject is Socializing'.

I'm sorry, but if your child has an obvious social disorder, do not buy a shirt like that.


This will bite me someday,
Brett . tterB

Thursday, September 28, 2006

YouTube's being irrational and not allowing me to post their videos on my blog 'click me play me all in the same window' style. This calls for poetry.

YouTube, YouTube
You tube because you tube
Except when you disallow
Allow me to use your Blogger Service
Or I'll punch a racoon
You don't want that, YouTube?

/Donkey Konga

I'm moderately obsessed with Super Smash Bros (4 n00bz: nintendos fightin game w/ charact0rz fro dffrnt games lik mario and zlda!). There, I said it.

Hooray for outbursts!

In conclusion,

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Jay to the Jay for the Oh!

"Brett do u play halo??/"

From time to time, yes. It is one of the best games if you have 8 friends and likewise as many controllers (4 on 4 for the win), but who has the time for companionship?

On a topic related closely enough to be considered 'insest', Bungie (the gangtaz behind Halo 1 AND 2) have unveiled their latest project: a Realtime Strategy game based off the Halo Universe, entitled HALO WARS.

Hopefully the title is just tenative, because HALO WARS is something you'd expect from a 14-year-old who dreams include Master Chief and bakers hat (do the math) or even worse, Electronic Arts.

Anyways, the game looks impressive but the details are still very hazy. Check out the trailer/official site if you must.

Speaking of the Evil Association, they pooped out some representatives for a interview with the Official Playstation Magazine. The article, featuring corporate chimps, serves up a summary of the publics view regarding the publishers: EA is teh suxxors.

Personally, my dislike for EA is due to their tendancies to hurry the release of certain games that could've been phenominal had the development been retarded (look it up). Examples include Goldeneye: Rouge Agent, NFL Street 2 and every other title that they've made in the past 3-4 years.

An amusing quote from the section; EA Vice Pres Jeff Brown responds to 'EA rushes games':
"Frequent software has bugs and some are worse than others. When you make sports games, you window is your sports season. You've got to be there at the start of the season. It makes no sense to ship Madden in January."

Brett disagrees:
'When you make sports games, you window is your sports season.'
1) That doesn't excuse the countless incomplete non-sports titles.
' has bugs and some are worse than others...'
2)So which is worse: a bug that spoils the gameplay, or a bug that totally ruins it?
'It makes no sense to ship Madden in January.'
3)Wait, yes it does. NFL Street 1 and 2 were both launched in the winter and they sold perfectly fine. And people would (and have) buy (bought) Madden if it was potato chip bag with a AA battery, why would they shy away from purchasing the actualy game (probably of better quality) during the playoffs/holiday season?

Bah, the sheep said as he listened to hip hop.

O Captain P Captain Q Captain,
Brett (who can be your captain)

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Daisy Whoopsie or Spontaneous Tripping

Somehow I stumbled my way to the offically offical The Grudge 2 site, and boy was it made with Flash!

Somewhere beyond all the inconclusive Japanese logographs, there's a game! You play as a heroic Asian cop, complete with super-duper white gloves, as he attempts to save a small presumably preteen boy from his home. One catch: the house is on fire!!!1

And there's some weird lady trying to kill you.

 Posted by Picasa


The only thing that's sort of cool about that screen shot is it's featuring of my birthday. Can YOU figure it out?

MS Paint? More like BSAint!!

Monday, September 25, 2006

~ =/= tab

No f'rizzle post tonight, instead you get a terribly sexist Q/A jokelike conversation.

Q: How do you turn a snowblower into a shovel?


A: Pee on it with your moose.

lolz mammls,

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Pipe Cutting Stoners cutting stone pipes.


Yup, I did.

Friends are great to have; if you have not yet experienced the joys and benefits of friendship/buddyhood/communism, you must be very lonely and I'll be your friend.

One of the best reasons to not be an introverted snob is multiplayer video games, and one of the best multiplayer video games that serves as a reason to not be an introverted snob is Circuit Breakers.

Circa 1998, this Playstation (to the power of zero) racing title is unique for its genre because it's not Mario Kart or Burnout or boring for people who don't feel the need to drive in a circle for 67 hours so they can unlock the (name of car brand here)(Specific Model). Another distinguiushing factor is the exchange of laps and checkpoints for quirky items and an awesomely different scoring system.

4-player mode puts the quartet of cars on the same screen/track. The race begins and the vehicles drive, pretty typical, right? Not quite; if a player falls too far behind first place, they are eliminated as the other racers remain driving. This continues until only one car is left and that everholy persistence is awarded first place and 2 points. First player to 12 points wins.

*sigh* It's hard to explain */sigh*

When it comes to racing games, simple and fun take the cake while they make the rake for Blake and Jake at the lake riding a wake.

You're entitled and encouraged to disagree.

Opium Ions,
Brock Ettiquite

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Bastardize this, you bastardizers.

"Brett, see any good movies lately?"

Well, if by 'good movies' you mean 'Pokemon' and when you said 'see' you intended it to be 'play a large amount of' then you got yourself a yes and a confusingly structured sentence.

Pokemon rules; I <3 PKMN; pokemon is teh r0xx0rz; Pokemon portrays a quite acceptable source of virtual recreation to children and adults alike, whatever. The little moneymaking creatures of Nintendo have always been in my heart, even after their flash-in-the-pan popularity dropped like a negative exponental function sometime between 1998 and 1999, they're still my goddamned furry and fiesty and flamethrowing friends.

Right now, one of my favorites is Hypno.


BRETT has fallen asleep, thus giving him an excuse to go to bed!

BRETT is too asleep to conclude!

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Dammit x 3

Writing sucks when you don't know what words to write.

Can't post, too busy being frustrated with an essay.

Bove in Lundles,

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Rolling ball pens are the new mechanical pencils.

Remember a few months ago when there was a blogpost about an article about a rant about frustration with out nation's Free Enterprise system?

"Well well, Brett gosta job!"

'Tis true, I can include myself in the group of a billion forcedly-polite and abnormally polite individuals, better known as the 'retail industry.' A job in a department store is a simple and effective way to make income all without expensive surgeries or daily regiments, because who really has time for a daily regiment? What the fuck, regiment doesn't fit into there at all, stupid hair-loss prevention psuedo-infomercials.

Oh yeah, that news is about a month old, s'rry!

*Conflict at Hand -> Heroes vs. Heros

I'm seriously having a extravagantly difficult time deciding which spelling variation to choice and use for the rest of my life. They're both so gosh-darn normal and appopriate and seemingly obsolete!

Stop signing in Jerry,
Brett + altering alteration.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Ha! Told you!

Lookie lookie! The first daily blog post, for all you doubting negative nancies/nicholases.

So it turns out that spotlights and video camcorders absolutely dislike each other. Like, Ann Coulter-level loathing; the hatred is hardcore and can easily ruin a good shot at a live event if you're not willing to be the middle-man for the two as they shout nonverbal proton-insults at each other which causes a big white flash that is anything but not blinding. Can't we all just get along or at least pretend that we do until we're separated and continue with spiting our way to freedom?

While on the topic of 'freedom', a dicussion in school today reulted in this comment:

'The war in Iraq has been one of the most sucessful in history.'

Now, I hate bringing politics up in any form of communication, but I have to disagree. There's a lot of wars out there to choose from, including:

-War of 1812 (The popular historical trivia classic)
-Spanish-American War or American-Spanish War
-The Cold War (America vs. USSR)
-The Warm War (Russia pleasantly talking with the English Colonies)
-The War of the Worlds (also known as 'Chapter 14 in the Scientology Book)
-The Battle for Lemon-Lime Supremecy (Sprite vs. Sierra Mist vs. 7up and countless generics)
-Console War of 2003 (Or: xbox sux u fehg/ps2=two penis sukrs/gamecube more lik worhtles)

It's hard consider the ongoing confusion in the Middle East with such a strong list of predecessors, but hey, people can be wrong all the fuck they want.


*Which current event do YOU feel strongest about? ('current events suck' is not an acceptable answer)

Hate to say otherwise,

Sunday, September 17, 2006

That's it!

This blog is going daily! I've had it with the fucking camels!

Here's both scoops, every night/midmorning/once-impossible psuedo-period that is created by shanking the space time continuum, I'll write and post, whether it'd be a paragraph, graphic, or topographer.

'But Brett, you suck. How do you figure to imagine such an ordeal?'

Well, I'll use these things that can be called 'paragraph catalysts', devices that use small-minded topic starters to produce, hopefully, quality paragraphs.

Because practice makes perfect and perfect makes practice and Mommies and Daddies make babies.